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I don't really know how to begin or say all that I've been feeling lately, but I know that the burden of getting this out in the open needs to get off my shoulders.
If I'm being completely honest, life has been like the weather here lately. Everything has a gray hue about it and it's been days since there's been a full sunny day. The humidity is so high that I've only wanted to stay inside and not deal with anything. Negativity has taken its hold on my mind, harsh words have been fired back and forth between loved ones, and several constants of my life have disappeared within a day's time. This isn't how I want to live-simply existing day by day, hoping that soon this present life that's leaving me drained of everything will change. I need to thrive, to live and to find my way out of this.
A couple days ago, I read this post and, really, it was just what I needed. When was the last time I spent time with God? How long has it been since I've read His word and poured out my heart to Him-not just ritual mealtime blessings? Way too long. He is my inspiration; He is love, joy, peace, and all the things that my life has been recently lacking. He should be the one I live for, write for, sing for, take pictures for.....and I'm so ashamed to say that He's been unconsciously pushed down on my priority list when He should be number one, and that's not okay with me. How can I ignore the One who's given me life, Who gave Himself up for me out of the deep love of His own heart? But not anymore. Today is the day for change. I'm going to specifically set aside time for me and Him and I'm going to renew this relationship. I'm letting go and letting God take control of my life because I know that I can't do it on my own. And I realize that life's hardships of right now won't magically or suddenly change, but God is my constant and I'm going to hold onto this roller coaster called life. I can trust with faith, remembering God's promises of Romans 8:28 and Jeremiah 29:11. Better days are ahead. xx
"Live today! Live fully each moment of today. Trust God to let you work through this moment and the next. He will give you all you need. Don't skip over the painful or confusing moment-even it has an important and rightful place in the day."
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October 3, 2012
letting go and letting God.
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your hair is so cute.
ReplyDeletethis post is fab. xo
I totally understand and can relate with you on all of this. I have really been asking myself lately, where is God is on my priorities list? He has been showing me I need to make Him my number one more. will pray for you!
ReplyDelete(and lovely picture! girl, you are gorgeous!)
oh orianna. thank you. thank you for sharing your heart; it was beautiful and i couldn't have asked for something better. (ironic - your blog is called 'pieces of a real heart'!)
ReplyDeletethis is SO good.
xx (off i go to re-read this post. it's just too good to resist.)
- acacia
Thank you so much for following me! Wow. This post really hit home for me. The way your life has been has almost best just like mine. I’ll definitely read that post you linked to. Thanks for sharing, we can both get through it together. :)
ReplyDelete-Victoria Horea
Oh, Oriana. This is just what I needed to read; just as you felt you needed to read Jennoelle's post. (it was a pretty lovely post, wasn't it?)
ReplyDeleteMy life has seemed out of sorts lately too. I feel like I wake up each day and....I just....survive. I don't want to merely BE HERE. I want to thrive and flourish. To enjoy every moment I am given.
And I haven't been as kind as I should be to my siblings. So you're not alone.
Wonderful post, darling! <3
Oh thank you! I needed that and it really encouraged me!
ReplyDeletewow Oriana, this is so encouraging!! i love Jennoelle's post. it's gorgeous. and that picture of you, ah..your so pretty!
ReplyDeletelots of love,
~Jess~
thank you, thank you, thank you.
ReplyDeletethank you for sharing your heart, oriana. i know exactly how you feel... but it's amazing how He is always there to receive us into His loving arms, even after we've pushed Him away, time and time again.
this post was such a blessing. once more, thank you. xo
Beautifully spoken, Oriana. :)
ReplyDelete"better days are ahead."
ReplyDeletehow did you know exactly how i've been feeling? love reading your posts, girl, and thanks for sharing your heart.